Triggered – Jhene’ Aiko
Before embracing being “Single Again”, was Triggered. It’s nothing like a good old nasty breakup. Both parties confused and don’t know what to do. Going through withdrawals and feeling every emotion possible. “I thought this was what I wanted”, “It is what I want”, or “We can just remain friends”. Then you really start to think about the time you spent, things you did, and evaluate the adjustments you gotta immediately make to ensure you don’t have any moments of despair. Moments where you’re instantly reminded of the person you’re trying to get over.
Initially you’re okay cause like Usher said “You don’t have to call”. You go gather up your girls/boys and hit the club or the kick back and get a few numbers to engage in rebound activity. Or you take the high road and remember who TF you are. You find a hobby, start working out, or engage in some extracurricular activity to distract you that is until you just can’t take it no more. Some of y’all gone probably go fuck ya ex ex and regret it. Days go by, reality sets in and then you start to resent that person. It’s even worse when you start thinking they out and about having a good time, living their best life when naturally they gotta be thinking the same thing about you, especially if it was real. Like I wasted my time and energy on this shit. I don’t even like you but I gotta share a kid with you? It was a bigger picture, but you just running a muck like you don’t even care? Man it don’t even matter, plus we most likely came to this agreement together, so our feelings should be mutual even when the reality checks in. Tit for tat, You start to remember all the bad and it trumps the good.
So why TF to I even care, cause I don’t think he/she do. People gone think all kinda shit now. We was a power couple, us never them, #Goals to some, last month it was “All I need in this life of sin” Now we over, #nothing. I just wanna see them, but I don’t want them. They gone miss me, right as soon as I stop missing them.
HOW DO I GET PAST THIS? Try music therapy and the steps below……
*DO NOT TELL ANYTHING (ESPECIALLY TO FAMILY) THAT YOU COULD REGRET SAYING ABOUT THE EX. ESPECIALLY IF YOU HOPE TO MAINTAIN ANY TYPE OF RELATIONSHIP WITH THIS PERSON* You could possibly get back together and it could make you look foolish.
- Separate yourself – It’s going to be hard to go from lovers to friends especially if emotions are involved. Take the time and space to heal
- Don’t try to forget, just forgive – Good and bad will remain regardless, work towards forgiving
- Practice self-care – Care for yourself the same way you once care for your relationship
- NEVER TAKE IT PERSONAL – Know that your worth is not defined by the status or success of your relationship.
- Write it out, Talk about it – Take the time to express how you feel. To get it off your heart, you may find that talking about it, helps gain clarity.
- Don’t (TRY Not) go back, especially if it was toxic – Maybe it didn’t work for a reason. Realize that rekindling may not be the answer to your loneliness and it most likely won’t solve the original problem that you had.
- Find the lesson in all of it – Learn from your success and failures. It will help with bettering yourself for your next relationship. Who knows maybe yall can come together and sing about it on a track. See yesterday’s review for “Single Again”
- I’ve found that its not much a little music therapy can’t fix. Make a or download a breakup playlist. Dance and sing along, eventually you’ll start to feel better.
Rhythm & Tru's 